Questions & Answers

If you’ve stopped drinking or on a Ross & Rachel break, you will know that there are certain questions people ask. I will always be respectful when I give my answers as I understand why they’re asking. And I used to ask them myself (pissed of course). But this post is the answers that flash through my mind ….

Q: Why aren’t you drinking anymore?

A: Why aren’t you engaging your brain before you talk anymore?

Q: Did you drink in the mornings?

A: No…..are you this annoying in the mornings?

Q: Are you an alcoholic?

A: What’s your favourite sexual position?

Q: Have you got a drink problem?

A: Have you got a “I cant stop asking stupid fucking questions” problem?

Q: Are you really bored now?

A: Since I’ve been talking to you hun yes.

Q: Have you lost loads of weight?

A: Have I fuck. I’ve replaced alcohol with doughnuts.

Q: Do you think I could do it?

A: Yes! Absolutely. If I can. You can. (I say that out loud of course).

As I said….I recognise the questions because I’ve asked them. I was that knob jockey who didn’t like being around “boring” sober people if I was drinking. I’d say shit like “I don’t trust people who don’t drink” and other cock womble sayings. So to be clear…. I am definitely not saying to repeat these!!!! But surely we can think them!!!

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