My dearest Liver,
I would first like to take this opportunity to apologise for the way I have treated you over the last 20 odd years. It wasn’t you, it was me. I was thoughtless and put you under unnecessary strain. You never complained, you just kept on helping me in the best way you knew how.
Our first 18 years together were beautiful. I treated you well at the start and we lived together in blissful ignorance. I may not have given you the attention you deserved or not even really noticed you were there. But at least I wasn’t forcing you to repair me on regular occasions and placing you under major strain.
Then at 18 things went a bit wrong and at that time I started numbing out. Your weekends were spent working all hours. That must have been tough. Add into that extra hours that I surprised you with and some really bad times when you wouldn’t have a day off for a couple of weeks. I also recognise that this carried on for about 20 years. I’m sorry.
The good news though my dear liver are that you stuck by me and we’ve come out the other side. Unscathed and healthier than ever. You are my silent hero and I will always be grateful to you. I look forward to us blossoming together over the next 40+ years and keeping up this beautiful relationship.
Love, your human.
P.s. I don’t mean to be horrible but I really hope to never see you or touch you. Soz.